Glen Thoughts

Well Stars Week continues a little bit longer here, with a favourite song of mine. I have spent the past five days talking about ex-lovers, apologies, on-line dating, child rearing, and those three special words, but all I’ve wanted to talk about is a magical place called Peak Hill. To help with our enjoyment of this truly enchanting song, is this great fan-made video…

The rain fell hard on the roofs that day
You telephone from far away
I see the ocean from my room
All I could say was “are you coming home soon?”
The static whisper in my ear
But in a moment your voice was clear
“I need some time,” you said to me
That’s when I knew you were gonna make me lonely

You’re gonna make me wish for the time right before I was born
When every living breath was another new dawn
Like the time I was 5 at the top of Peak Hill
And the wind almost took me away

You’re gonna make me wish for the time right before I was born
When every living breath was another new dawn
Like the time I was 5 at the top of Peak Hill
And the wind almost took me away

I walk awhile before I sleep, count the secrets that I keep
I hope for more, I know for sure I fall apart before I weep
I disconnect the telephone, cause I can choose to be alone
I’ll get more done, I’ll have some fun, pretend you’re not the only one

And I’m never gonna wish for the time right before I was born
When every living breath was another new dawn
Like the time I was 5 at the top of Peak Hill
And the wind almost took me away

You’re gonna make me wish for the time right before I was born
When every living breath was another new dawn
Like the time I was 5 at the top of Peak Hill
And the wind almost took me away

– Lyrics courtesy of Lyricsmania.com

Having your heart broken is a horrible, horrible experience. It leaves you weak, bitter and alone. Many, many songs have been written on the subject, but few capture it so well with such a light rhythm and innocent lyrics as this one.

With the light synth notes and the powerful, yet simple line of “you were gonna make me lonely” this song just feels childish. The harmonizing that Amy and Torq perform during this chorus makes the song sound like it belongs in a fairy tale.

The words they use in this song are so simple and to the point, “you’re going to make me wish for the time right before I was born”, is almost infantile in its approach to heartbreak. It is so natural to wish that a relationship never happened. However, these feelings tend to be cast aside as immature. This song does something that few others dare to do, it dares to be immature.

Near the end of the song, there is a hint of overcoming the adversity when they say “I’ll get more done, I’ll have some fun, pretend you’re not the only one” and then they change the chorus up by saying “And I’m never gonna wish for the time right before I was born”. However, a stanza later they go right back to the depressing chorus, showing us that maybe they weren’t empowered after all. This is an admission of failure in the healing process, and certainly not the actions of a mature, healthy individual.

While this is far from the first song written about break-ups, and probably far from the best. However, it certainly ranks among the most daring, as it is able to make the victim appear as a smaller person, which is certainly a rarity.

Whenever I get around to making a second round of Music to Wallow to, I know that I will include this song, which I am ashamed to say I had not heard when I made the first list. While this, and any songs of its kind, are meant to be downers, they are an important part of any healing process. It is important to be honest with yourself and your emotions, and few songs are as honest as this one.

Until next time,

G

Now that all four albums have been represented here during Stars Week, it’s time to give Set Yourself on Fire a second dose. After looking at sad songs for the first four days I’ll take a break and look at a great synth-filed, up-beat poppy song, enjoy “What I’m Trying to Say”.

You look so good in the clothes of a poser
And when you smiled all the kids fell apart here
I know a place where it’s warm and it’s dry, dear
Let me take you there

North of the river all the streets are the same
We can pretend that they don’t know our name
And the heat is turned all the way to full
So don’t pretend that you don’t feel the pull

I am trying to say
What I want to say
Without having to say
“I love you”

You look so good in the shoes of an outcast
I kissed your throat every time they said it wouldn’t last
But then I knew you, I knew you, I knew you
I really knew you

We fell apart in the parties of the empty heart
We danced the junkies in the shadows of bad modern art
We clicked our heels and we wished we were home
One more tab and your silk hits the chrome

I am trying to say
What I want to say
Without having to say
“I love you”

I am trying to say
What I want to say
Without having to say
“I love you”

Springs comes in when I’m rolling up another one
I draw the curtains in the glare of the same old sun
We are collapsed in the act of just being here
Three blues, two greens and a beer…
We are collapsed in the act of just being here
Three blues, two greens and a beer…

I am trying to say
What I want to say
Without having to say
“I love you”

I am trying to say
What I want to say
Without having to say
“I love you”

– Lyrics courtesy of AZLyrics.com

Three words can say so much, yet so little at once. They can move mountains, or make the world stand still. They can fly so effortlessly from your lips, or awkwardly fumble out of your mouth. They are the hardest words to instigate but the easiest to retaliate. They are the words that we never tell to everyone we need to. They are “I love you”.

The man in this song is clearly in love, as he struggles with his ability to express himself. While he does not want to say the dreaded three words, he is able to get this across with such words as “So don’t pretend that you don’t feel the pull” and “We are collapsed in the act of just being here”, which so vividly expresses the emotions that he is trying to convey.

The first three days of Stars Week were about ambiguity and double meaning, and yesterday was about disappointment, this one is about another common theme in Stars songs, growing up. I don’t have earth shattering memories of the first time that I ever told a girl that I loved them, but that’s because when you are young, it’s too easy. Every time you say it to someone new, you get a better understanding of just what it means, and therefore it gets harder and harder each time.

After you have been hurt once before it is so much harder to open up your heart, and tell someone how you really feel. Due to the increased difficulty, there is a desire to find alternate methods of expression and a need to skirt around the issue. However, it is once you have been hurt before that you need to let someone else in even more. While it is harder, it is even more important to find the words and say just what you are trying to say.

Until next time,

G

In the first three installments of Stars Week I have examined a song off of a different album each time. The trend continues today, as I take a look at a song off of their debut album Nightsongs entitled “The Very Thing”. While there was no official video for this song, there is this excellent fan made video featuring clips from Kramer vs. Kramer.

The bar closes early on the Sabbath day
So me and my kid, we hit the park to play
Then it starts to rain, so we walk home again
He asks why he was born, I don’t know what to say
I don’t feel guilty and I don’t feel sad
This motherfucking life is the best he’s had
I said “I’ve been there, sonny, and it ain’t that bad
I took my hits from the shits back when I was a lad”

So long ago, and even though I tried
I couldn’t make him see
The light that he had cast in front of me
And even though I cried, I couldn’t make him be
The very thing I needed

His mother would make a scene when I come home late
She looks like she’s dying and she’s twenty-eight
I never loved that whore, I never will no more
Except for a month back in ‘84
The jammin’ was playing and my heart stood still
Gazing at her shadow on the windowsill

So long ago, and even though I tried
I couldn’t make her see
I wasn’t quite the man she thought I’d be

And even though I cried, I couldn’t make her be
The very thing I needed

And even though I tried
I couldn’t make her see
I wasn’t quite the man she thought I’d be
And even though I cried, I couldn’t make her be
The very thing I needed

Could she be the very thing I needed?
Could she be the very thing?

Push yourself away from your one best friend
Who’s gonna love you when you reach the end?
Who will?
Who will?
Who will?

– Lyrics courtesy of Lyricsmania.com

There is one reaction that everyone fears getting from someone. It is not anger, not hatred, not even sadness. Oh no, it is far worse that that. It is disappointment.

Unlike the first few songs I have examined, this one has a relatively simple, yet powerful message, disappointments suck.

While, thankfully, I have never had to deal with being a negligent father, I can relate to the disappointment that echoes throughout this song. The main character (sang by Torq) identifies with a heavy heart not only the disappointment that he casts onto others (”Even though I tried/I couldn’t make her see/I wasn’t quite the man she thought I’d be”), but also the disappointment that others give him (”And even though I cried, I couldn’t make her be/The very thing I needed”).

Perhaps the saddest part of the song though is the line “Could she be the very thing I needed?”, which is said after repeating many times that she couldn’t be the very thing that he needed and that he “Never loved that whore”. This is exceptionally sad, because after giving and receiving so much disappointment, he begins to both accept and expect it.

As sad as heartbreak is, I think that someone staying in a relationship where they aren’t happy is far worse. To be with someone who you don’t love for want of a better alternative goes beyond tragedy. It is just plain disappointing.

Until next time,

G

The week long examination of one of Canada’s best, and most underrated bands continues! The first day, I looked at their most famous song, the second I looked at a great old one, and today, I look at a great little ditty off of their most recent album, In Our Bedroom After the War. I’m happy to present you with another unofficial video, followed by the lyrics. Warning, this song is not for the faint at heart.

[Wanted:]
Single f, under 33, must enjoy the sun, must enjoy the sea
[Sought by single m:] Mrs.Destiny, send photo to address, is it you and me?

[Reply to single m:]
My name is Caroline cell phone number here, call if you have the time
28 and bored, grieving over loss, sorry to be heavy but heavy is the cost, heavy is the cost

[Reply to Caroline:]
Thanks so much for response, these things can be scary
Not always what you want
How about a drink? The St.Jude club at noon?
I’ll phone you first I guess
I hope I see you soon!

I never got your name, I assume you’re 33
Your voice it sounded kind
I hope that you like me
When you see my face, I hope that you don’t laugh
I’m not a film-star beauty
I sent a photograph
I hope that you don’t laugh…

[Note to single m:]
Why did you not show up?
I waited for an hour and finally gave up
I thought once that I saw you, I thought that you saw me
I guess we’ll never meet now
It wasn’t meant to be
I was sure that you saw me, but it wasn’t meant to be

[Wanted:]
single f, under 33, must enjoy the sun, must enjoy the sea
Sought by single m:
nothing too heavy, send photo to address
is it you?
or me?

– Lyrics courtesy of AZLyrics.com

In my previous two entries, I discussed the dichotomies contained in each of the two songs, “Your Ex-Lover is Dead” is part somber, part empowering, while “Heart” is part forgiving, and part settling. Well today I break that pattern. This song is just sad.

Personal adds either in newspapers or on-line have always intrigued me. I must say, that I have never used that service, but I know plenty of people who have, many of which will swear by it. Whenever someone mentions that they met someone on the internet through any sort of dating service there are always a few who snicker behind their back and talk about how “pathetic” it is and how they “couldn’t find anyone better”. I personally don’t care, love is a strange thing and finds people in strange places, be they real or cyber.

While the song doesn’t specifically state that the two are meeting on-line, it seems obvious given the ease in which Caroline can send “Single m” a picture, and given the nature of our society, if it is not on-line, it doesn’t make a huge difference to the storyline. The two characters agree to meet in person after seeing one another’s adds. While the obvious sad stories and concerns that people have about this sort of thing revolve around the other person being creepy and/or dangerous.

However, in true Stars fashion, this song looks at it from a different dimension, and as usual there are multiple ways to look at it.

The obvious one is from Caroline’s point of view. She is nervous and scared, since she is “grieving over loss”, and so she sends a picture to “Single m”. However, she is clearly very insecure that he may not find her attractive, and so she shows up to meet him but he never comes. She is convinced that she saw him at one point, although there is no mention that she ever got a picture of him, or else perhaps she would have said more than “Your voice it sounded kind”.

Whether Caroline saw him or not, her story is a sad one. She puts herself out there and gets rejected, never an easy story. Now Caroline, clearly has some other issues with her self-confidence and has more than likely had some relationship troubles before (”grieving over loss” yet again), and so being rejected, will no doubt make these issues even worse. It doesn’t matter why “Single m” did not show up, in some part of her mind it will be because she is either unattractive or just not that interesting.

Now on the side we have “Single m” and any potential for his tragedy. After my initial listen to this song I was convinced that he was someone who tried to pick girls up on the internet all time, and took advantage of poor Caroline. However, upon repeated listening and reflection I think that there is a chance for a deeper character than that.

While the song follows Caroline’s anxieties, it is entirely possible that he felt the same way. Single m specifically says “these things can be scary”. So maybe, just maybe, he was too scared to meet up with Caroline, and so he backed out of it all. This would explain the repetition of his personal ad at the end. He was scared, ducked out and decided to repost and try again.

I realize that the second thought is far less likely, but there is still that certain ambiguity in the song. In the first two I looked at it was emotional ambiguity, now this time it is a lack of clarity in the story itself.

While this is often frustrating, in the context of this song (and the others) it adds a whole other dimension to the plot, leaving things for you to pick up each time you listen to it. Now that is of course a heavy contrast from the majority of music out there, which is so simple and to the point that you really only need to listen to it once to understand it. Illustrating the point once more that Stars are among the best bands out there right now, their songs have depth, which seems so simple, yet, as the music industry shows us every day is so hard to get.

Until next time,

G

I started Stars week with a look at perhaps their most famous song. Today I look at a much lesser known, but equally meaningful song. It is the title track from their second album, Heart. Just like last day, here is the (unofficial) video, followed by the lyrics.

Time can take it’s toll on the best of us
Look at you you’re growing old so young
Traffic lights blink at you in the evening
Tilt your head and turn it to the sun
Sometimes the T.V. is like a lover
Singing softly as you fall asleep
You wake up in the morning and it’s still there
Adding up the things you’ll never be

Alright, I can say what you want me to,
Alright, I can do all the things you do,
Alright, I’ll make it all up for you,
I’m still in love with you,
I’m still in love with you

Time can take it’s toll on the best of us
Look at you you’re growing old so young
Traffic lights blink at you in the evening
You tilt your head and turn it to the sun
You disembark the latest flight from paradise
You almost turn your ankle on the snow
You fall back into where you started
Make up words to songs you used to know
So…

Alright, I can say what you want me to,
Alright, I can do all the things you do,
Alright, I’ll make it all up for you,
I’m still in love with you,
I’m still in love with you,

The hard luck god
You never had a chance you know
Incurable romantics never do
He held the flame I wasn’t born to carry
I’ll leave the dieing young stuff up to you
You get back on the latest flight to paradise
I found out, from a note taped to the door
I think I saw your airplane in the sky tonight
Through my window, lying on the kitchen floor.

Alright, I can say what you want me to,
(I want more)
Alright, I can do all the things you do,
(Give me more)
Alright, I’ll make it all up for you,
I’m still in love with you,
I’m still in love with you,
(I want more)
Alright, I’ll say you want me to,
(Give Me More)
Alright, I’ll do all the things you do,
(I Want More From You)
Alright, I’ll make it all up for you,
I’m still in love with you,
I’m still in love with you

– Lyrics courtesy of AZLyrics.com

Sometimes there is nothing harder to say than sorry. Seeking forgiveness requires you to admit that you were wrong and that you regret your actions. This is especially convoluted in the context of a relationship, where there are many more emotions at play.

As usual, Amy Milan and Torquil Campbell are able to capture all of the emotions flawlessly. The verbal interaction between these two express a deep, and eloquent longing. Torq starts out as the sad one, stuck with only the television to fill the void of his departed love. Then Amy Milan’s angelic voice comes in with a deep sense of regret and a desire to fix all of their problems, admitting that she would “say what you want me to”.

What gets me the most about this song is the feeling that both of the characters in this song are stuck in a rut. As Torq says that Amy “falls back into where you started/Make up the words to songs you used to know”. Also, in the end, there is a slight hint that Amy is settling in a relationship that she may not want to be in and giving in to Torq’s guilt and clear love.

However, the true beauty of this song is in its ambiguity. Similar to “Your Ex-Lover is Dead”, it is one of those songs that you could probably find two very different meanings to, depending on your mood. Are you sad and want to win that special someone back? Or do you feel guilted into staying in a relationship that you may not want to be in? Either way this song is for you.

Yet again, this song by Stars runs the full emotional gambit, in a brave, yet eloquent way. This is exceptionally important when it comes to apologizing, because it is such a hard thing to do to, so you may as well do it right the first time. In a true musical rarity, this song does it right the first time.

Until next time,

G

Greetings and salutations all. While today is Wednesday, I am officially dubbing it the start of the week here at Getting Glenergized. In one week, I will have the pleasure of going to see one of the best bands this country has to offer, Stars. So as my own personal countdown I will be looking at some of their songs and talking about what they mean to me. So whether you know the band or not, buckle in because the next days should be an epic musical journey…

As you can probably tell from the graphic, the first song I am going to look at is probably their most famous one, “Your Ex-Lover is Dead”. So before I start, here have a watch of the video and a read of the lyrics…

God that was strange to see you again
Introduced by a friend of a friend
Smiled and said ‘yes I think we’ve met before’
In that instant it started to pour,
Captured a taxi despite all the rain
We drove in silence across Pont Champlain
And all of the time you thought I was sad
I was trying to remember your name…

This scar is a fleck on my porcelain skin
Tried to reach deep but you couldn’t get in
Now you’re outside me
You see all the beauty
Repent all your sin

It’s nothing but time and a face that you lose
I chose to feel it and you couldn’t choose
I’ll write you a postcard
I’ll send you the news
From a house down the road from real love…

Live through this, and you won’t look back…
Live through this, and you won’t look back…
Live through this, and you won’t look back…

There’s one thing I want to say, so I’ll be brave
You were what I wanted
I gave what I gave
I’m not sorry I met you
I’m not sorry it’s over
I’m not sorry there’s nothing to save

I’m not sorry there’s nothing to save…

– Lyrics courtesy of AZlyrics.com

The second I heard this song I was hooked. After hearing this song, I put it on repeat, with each listen I broke down the lyrics more and more deliberately. At the risk of sounding cliche and trite, I feel that this song was sang directly to me.

This song just so genuinely captures all of the feelings of a break-up so very eloquently. So many break-up songs fall into one of two categories, the empowering ones, or the wallowing ones, this song is able to find a genuine, and very rare, mix of the two.

The repeated line of “Live through this, and you won’t turn back…” expressing the suffering that the characters in the song are going through, but it contains the promise of a better time. While the earlier lines of “It’s nothing but time and a face that you lose/I chose to feel it and you couldn’t choose” really convey the essence of a relationship breakdown. One person falls so deeply in love, while the other person himms and haas, staying at a distance. This is such a realistic contrast to the usual “You were horrible” type lines that permeate so many songs about breaking up.

While break-ups inevitably suck, there is still a conflicting emotion, as you clearly felt something for the other person at one point or another, despite the current situation. This song does a fantastic job of mixing the empowering with the melancholy, and switching between the two with the lyrics, the tone and the pace, in a seamless manner.

This is one of those amazing songs to listen to late at night when you are thinking about someone from days past. When the song reaches it’s zenith and Amy Milan’s angelic voice chymes in with “I’m not sorry I met you/I’m not sorry it’s over/I’m not sorry there’s nothing to save”, then the song is able to pass through the last step in the grieving process, acceptance as closure is finally attained.

I guess I feel that this song spoke to me so clearly, because I found it at a very crucial time in my life, when I was ready to move on. Sad and angry songs are great, but they don’t ever deal with the root of the issue. I had heard this song, and the band before this crucial stage in my life but I wasn’t all that into them. But it was when I heard this song at that very crucial point in my life that I became hooked. While I know that I searched out this song, I can’t help but feel that it found me when I needed it the most. Oddly, this will be a very common theme this entire week.

At the point that I became enamored with this song, I was ready to finally let go of anything that I was holding onto. I was ready to just move on with my life and not let anything hold me back. This song is an integral part of a soundtrack for those brave enough to confront the gambit of emotions that go along with a break-up. If you’re not ready for this song, don’t worry, it will come to you when you are…

Until next time,

G